Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. John 15:13-15
There are three kinds of friends. Those who pull you into a pit, those who keep you in the same place you have always been and those who elevate you to be the person God intended you to be. Change the first, elevate the second and treasure the third.
The pit-pullers are people who draw your attention away from God and fuel your basic ungodly desires. They complain and gossip enticing you into doing the same. They pit friend against friend – co-worker against co-worker – sister against sister – brother against brother – pulling you into the pit of turmoil. They thrive on intrigue and underhand machinations fueled by jealousy and pride. They are quick to tell people what to do and what not to do – judgmental of all but themselves. They stab you and others in the back drawing you into the same dreadful behavior.
The pit pullers are toxic to spiritual growth and emotional health. They stunt others progress in life. They may very well be religious and think they are in touch with God but they don’t seek Him in prayer before opening their mouths or deciding their course of action.
If you are a pit puller (and we all are at certain times in our lives) make a concerted effort to turn to God, change your thinking and seek out friends who can encourage Godly behavior.
“Status quo” friends keep you where you are. They agree with you on most things. They rarely disagree and rarely encourage you to seek God in your quest to figure out a problem. They will certainly aid you in times of trouble but are not helpful when it comes to figuring out your course of action because they are lost themselves. Although they rarely pull you into a pit, they do not challenge you to turn to God or seek Him in your quest. They do provide companionship, laughter and friendship – very good qualities in a friend. But when your life gets tough, their companionship does not propel you forward – it keeps you where you are.
God-seeking friends are keepers. They are people who you know care deeply for your soul. They do not have to be people you see everyday, but they are people that would lay down their lives for you – in a heartbeat they would pick you up from any place you were stranded; they could be called anytime of the day or night.
God seekers are people who challenge you to be your best – to be who God intended you to be. They do not gossip but instead discourage you from sliding down a slippery slope. They rarely tell you what to do because they know that you must seek answers directly from God – they know they are merely facilitators in your quest. God seekers walk with you – they stand beside you – they encourage you to do what is right and good.
God seekers remind you of who you are in Christ – they remind you that you are beloved by God. They remind you that your faith as small as a mustard seed can move a mountain. They remind you that the God you serve is good and that by placing your unknown future in God’s hands you have nothing to worry about.
Remember the words of Jesus . . .
You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. This is my command: Love each other. John 15:16-17
Remember also . . .
To different people, we could be a “pit puller”, “status quo” friend or a God seeker. As we grow in our own walk with God, hopefully we eliminate our own behavior that puts us in the “pit puller” or “status quo” friend category.
So . . . when reviewing your list of friends and prior to getting rid of the “pit pullers” – make sure you seek God to determine if that is what He would have you do. Maybe you are the one being called to be the God seeker to your pit-puller!